October 2011

Monthly Archives: October 2011

October 25, 2011 · 7:49 PM

Wait! I’m Not Fat?!

Three months ago I wrote a blog called “I Will Learn To Love My Body“.

*If you didn’t read it before, go check it out now, I’ll wait right here for you. No. Seriously, go check it out. What are you waiting for?

Well, while I wouldn’t say I am head over heels in love with it now, I certainly see the progress I’ve made and no longer see a “fat girl” in the mirror.

Unfortunately, I still have hang-ups. I have days where all I focus on is what still needs to be improved, but I’m human and we all have self loathing days, right? Plus I have the whole being a woman thing working against me here. Sigh…

Overall, the important thing to me is that I understand how far I have come, how hard I have worked and how important it is to remain healthy.

I don’t know why it took so long for me to come to terms with this. I don’t know exactly what changed and allowed me to accept that I have lost over 100lbs. I practically lost a person, yet I mentally carried all of that extra weight around with me on a daily basis! What I do know, is that I am happy to finally be in this place and I hope I can continue to push forward and learn to fully love myself.

blog sig

P.S. – I had a slight set back (aka – I went into slacker mode) with Insanity but I’m scheduled to finish up next week and hope to blog about that soon.

3 Comments

Filed under Health & Fitness

Tagged as Health & Fitness, Personal Growth, Self Acceptance

October 3, 2011 · 9:16 AM

INSANITY: Max Interval Circuit

Month 2 started yesterday and as I expected, I struggled through my workout.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, month two of Insanity is all mental.

For those of you who have done the program before, you know what I am talking about.

Month one is basically a warm-up. It physically prepares you for what month two is getting ready to dish out. The workouts in month 1 are all under 40 mins and end right around the point you start to psych yourself out and say “I can’t do this”. They build up your confidence and show you just how amazing your body is and what it is capable of doing.

Enter month two…

Max month (to me) is a smack in the face. You pop that disc in, ready to make this workout your bitch and you are greeted by a countdown bar at the bottom of your screen that says you have 59 mins remaining. “59 minutes?! Are you kidding me?!” At that moment, doubt begins to creep into my mind and the game begins. The warm-up feels never ending, the stretch a welcome relief and then…the first interval. (cue dread filled music)

Round one of Interval 1, I kept telling myself “You got this”. I pushed myself through, but my eye….it kept wandering to that damn countdown bar and it didn’t like what it saw. My mind began to tell me I couldn’t complete this. With that, the mind vs. body struggle began.

Round two of Interval 1, my mind was winning. I kept looking at the clock and before I knew it, I was kneeling on the floor after in & outs, crying. “WTF?! I’ve done this before! I’ve completed this! Get up, bitch!” is all I kept telling myself.

Round three and beyond, my body took over. I made a decision to NOT look at that clock again. I REFUSED to allow my eyes to wander over to the lower left hand corner of my screen. I pushed, I screamed, I cursed, but I finished and I felt accomplished.

Fast forward to this morning and I feel like I was hit by a damn bus, but I conquered a demon yesterday morning in my living room and it feels good.

Today, I have Max Interval Plyo. I’m a little nervous about the inner battle that will take place again today, but I’m going to put my money on my body! I didn’t come all this way to give up now…plus I am stubborn and don’t like to lose!

blog sig