During my long and winding journey to the new me, I’ve discovered that you not only become physically stronger, but you also become mentally stronger. As a matter of fact, you have to become mentally stronger before you can become physically stronger. If the mind is weak, it simply won’t let you reach your goals.
Most of the journey is one about choices. You have to decide what to eat everyday. You have to decide to push play, or to put on your running shoes and hit the pavement. It’s all about choice.
Everyday when you wake up, you have to face a whole day of choices. Should I eat the Poptart that is taunting me from the cabinet or have a Shakeology and start my day off right? I have an hour to spare. Should I do my workout now or watch TV, tweet or see what’s new on Facebook? All of these choices add up and in the beginning they are not easy to make. As time goes by and you fall into a groove they become easier, especially as you see results.
Every now and then, something will trip you up. In my case, it was Insanity month 2…..the Max workouts. For all of month 1 and even before I started doing Insanity, all I ever heard was how hard the Max workouts were. I had never even popped a Max workout DVD in to check it out and I was scared. I would listen to others talk about it and psych myself out before I even knew what Shaun T was going to ask of me.
Monday started month 2 of Insanity, and I faced my 1st Max workout late in the afternoon, after work. All day I read about my #insanecrew’s experience with Max Interval Circuit and how hard it was. I of course became nervous and already had it set in my head that I wouldn’t be able to finish this workout….I mean who can stand a 64min Insanity workout?!
As I stood there in my living room, nervous, the workout began and I was thrust into a new warm-up and whole new routine……man was it hard! I barely made it through some of the moves and I skipped over or modified a few but I finished. I quickly grabbed my iPod and tweeted a big FUCK YOU to Shaun T. That workout left me feeling broken. My confidence was shot, I was mad and my poor performance left me feeling disappointed in myself. I was stronger than that, wasn’t I?
I went into Day 2, Max Interval Plyo, with the same feelings. I was nervous but thankful that this workout would be shorter than the previous one. As I was doing the warm-up I felt more confident because I knew what to expect. I also reminded myself that I could do this….and if I couldn’t, I would do my absolute best and forget the rest. The workout wasn’t pretty, but I made it through and rewarded myself with a nice, cold, yummy, Results and Recovery Drink!
Today was Day 3 and I had to Dig Deep! I promised myself before leaving for work that I would not procrastinate. I would go home and start my workout right away. I would not worry about it, I would not look at the screen and say “I can’t do THAT!”, I would simply go with the flow and push myself to a new, greater level. Max Cardio Conditioning was my redemption workout! I pressed play, I dug deep and I felt great when it was over. I didn’t skip or modify anything. I kept a good pace and I kept telling myself throughout the workout “You can do this!” Don’t get me wrong, I took my breaks, but I jumped back in and finished everything out.
If there is one thing I have learned over the past year, it’s that most of the battle is mind over matter. When it comes to a program like Insanity, your mental strength will truly be tested. I believe that Insanity is 90% mental strength. You build a new confidence in yourself and realize what amazing things your body is capable of. As a side effect or reward, you gain increased cardiovascular strength, muscle tone and if you’re lucky, a nice set of abs.
I know the next few weeks are going to be a challenge, but it’s a challenge I’m up for and actually looking forward to. I’m an amazing person, capable of amazing things and Shaun T is going to show me just how strong I can be…both mentally and physically.
3 responses to “I Can Do This! I Think?”
Not to rip off the president, but YES…YOU…CAN! Just think how far you’ve come (I’m not talking about the fit test numbers here) and remember how the first month went. There’s a learning curve, and it’s more intense, but I know how strong you are mentally. This month is like going to see a sequel: you go in with expectations and wind up disappointed because they aren’t met; but take it on it’s own merit and it’s not so bad.
In my opinion, you’ve always been too hard on yourself, had really high expectations for yourself. Im not saying that having standards is bad, but sometimes it seems like you’re getting back at yourself for what you let yourself turn into. That being said, I’m glad you’re already cutting yourself slack. I know that, by that 63rd day, you’ll be just as amazed by what you accomplished as you were by the 28th. And that, my dear friend, will be something to celebrate. I hope you’ll enjoy it, because let’s face it: how many people can hack it? How many are willing to TRY this program, much less finish it? And reflect on your initial experience, to see just how far you’ve truly come in such a relatively short period of time.
I hope you won’t just be proud of yourself, but that you’ll be satisfied as well….
My darling dear, you are a machine. Plain and simple! I’ve hit these same EXACT road blocks myself when i started insanity and even with p90x. Even having gone through the motions and having done it before you still can never prepare yourself enough. It’s always a surprise how hard it is or how painful it is or how much you’re pushing yourself physically and mentally.
You’re doing awesome and coming to these bumps and realizations is all part of the journey. Learning how to handle yourself when you feel psyched out and defunct is just as important as completing a workout. =] You’re right, it absolutely is 90% mental with insanity… with any challenging workout really…with any CHALLENGE at all! =P My new mantras are “If you can breathe, you can fight. You’re only defeated when you decide.” and “Failure is a choice.” I used them tonight when i was on the cement trying to find the will to get one more rep out and they couldn’t be more helpful.
We are thee best of thee best because we see every stride of this journey as a lesson to be learned. =] I’m proud of you, my friend. At one point it was you who were saying just about the equivalent to me and now it’s you who’s taken over that seat and I who are saying such things. =D Keep up the good work and remember even though we sometimes lose the battles we still fight with everything we have and, in the end, will win the war. =] <3
and this is why I <3 ya girl! You're a fighter! You may lay down and take a rest but you NEVER die! I'm so glad you're joining my "90 Days To A Better You" challenge. You inspire me, we push each other and neither of us will let the other fail. We have goals to reach and together, we are unstoppable! Dig Deep & Bring It! =]